Lip gloss

Do not apply lip gloss right before your haircut!

I once saw a woman applying thick lip gloss while waiting for her stylist to start cutting her hair. She stood there in front of the mirror very  slowly and carefully putting on a thick dark red layer of lip gloss. She made a production out of it. I just watched, saying nothing. This woman was a crazy bitch and more than once snarled or snapped at me. I just watched and smiled.

Forty minutes later I was rewarded. As her bangs were being trimmed it was like every hair was a metal shaving and her lips were magnetized! She looked like a three year old that had eaten something sticky and then snuggled with the kitty. Her lips were covered with a thick layer of short dark hair. The look of disgust on her face as she tried to wipe them off was delicious. Of course this smeared the bright red gloss and made her look more like a cheap prostitute than a elegantly coiffed lady.

She saw me in the mirror watching her and shot me a look of pure viciousness. I smiled a little and said “Well, I guess putting on lip gloss right before you get a haircut isn’t a very good idea.”

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