I am stressed and I suck at it.
I actually wrote this post a few weeks ago but didn’t publish it. Why? Because when it comes to negative shit in my life I don’t like to go around advertising it. In a way I am superstitious, I don’t want to attract more bad stuff. And I come from that Scandahoovian stock that thinks you should pull yourself up by your bootstraps. This also means I suck at asking for help when I need it. Martyr complex, anyone?
I am having a hard time concentrating. Lots of ideas about how to deal with the stress in my life but no momentum. Ironic that sometimes when I get depressed I have lots of energy but no focus. I can spend an entire day running around but accomplish nothing.
I don’t know if this is better than when I am depressed and have no energy? When I sleep 10, 12 hours and still feel tired. At least then I know why I am getting nothing done.
This too will hopefully pass and I will become more productive again. Of course hopefully I won’t go into one of those crazy phases my family likes to call Kim’s gone manic again.
Vicious circle, depression stresses me out and I get nothing done. Getting nothing done stresses me out. I do see the irony in this.